There is an entire plastic spoon in your brain right now.

I wish I was kidding.

We all know what nano and microplastics are. Little pieces of plastic the size of a grain of sand or smaller. But did you know they have been found at the deepest part of Earth in the Mariana Trench? Or on Mount Everest? Or in the most remote areas of American National Parks?

There are 8 BILLION TONS of plastic on Earth. That’s one ton per every human on the planet.

But do you know how much is floating around in your body right now?

Spoiler: It’s not great.

Nano and microplastics have been found in virtually every organ of the human body. The kidneys. Liver. Placenta. Testes. From head to toe, there is plastic in there. Floating around like Dennis Quaid in Innerspace.

The last time the levels of nanoplastics and microplastics were measured in the human body was in 2016. A new study out from the University of New Mexico has found that in the 8 years since, the levels of these plastics has risen by 50%.

What organ has the highest concentration of these Mini Quaids? The human brain.

Dr. Matthew Campen and his team of researchers at UNM found that the average American 45-50 year old samples of brain tissue they tested for plastics had the weight equivalent of a plastic spoon.

“Compared to autopsy brain samples from 2016, that’s about 50% higher,” Dr. Campen said in an interview. “That would mean that our brains today are 99.5% brain and the rest is plastic.”

HOW ARE THEY GETTING INTO THE BRAIN?

The brain has this rad supermoat called the Blood Brain Barrier that protects it and the spinal cord from toxic substances and pathogens from getting through. These little trojan horses are hitching rides on the fat cells and getting into the brain tissue and squatting there. Dementia and Alzheimer’s patients have UP TO 10 TIMES THIS AMOUNT.

Are you ready for the cherry on this shit sundae?

We are consuming up to 5 GRAMS OF NANO AND MICROPLASTICS PER WEEK. That is the weight equivalent of a credit card.

While first generation plastics are terrible for the planet and we all should be limiting our single-use plastics like water bottles, take out containers and cutting boards, those plastics are the nanoplastics and microplastics of our grandchildren. The plastics getting into our bodies today mostly come from landfills and are leeching into streams and runoffs, the groundwater, and ultimately the water irrigation systems we use for agriculture and farming. These same plastics have been found in the meat supply including, chicken, pork and eggs. And don’t even get me started on what happens when you microwave a plastic container.

WHAT CAN WE DO?

Since there is no current way out of this, it looks like we have to work with what we’ve got.

Plastic production doubles every 10-15 years and Dr. Campen says that until we invest in and research better ways to dispose of our plastic waste as a species, our best bet as consumers is to limit meat from our diet. And even then, meat-alternatives are testing positive for nanoplastics.

I wanted there to be a call to action. A petition we could all sign. A protest we could go to. But there is nothing. With the way things are going with research and development into climate science and human health in this administration, it looks like help is most definitely not on the way.